


The Perks of Being a Perma-Fusion

by iippo



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-22
Updated: 2018-01-22
Packaged: 2019-03-08 04:40:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13450752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iippo/pseuds/iippo
Summary: Some thoughts and feelings with Garnet and Steven. Set somewhere in Season 3.References to episodes "Giant Woman" (S1.E12), "Jail Break" (S1.E52), "Gem Drill" (S3.E2) and "Off Colors" (S5.E3)





	The Perks of Being a Perma-Fusion

Garnet warped home. It was quiet and dark; seemed like no one else was around. She looked through the downstairs and climbed upstairs but Steven wasn't home. She sighed and stood a moment, thinking. 

Pearl was probably in the temple, Amethyst was probably on the boardwalk, Steven was probably somewhere with Connie... 

She tried to shut off her future vision, forced herself to not follow the winding paths of possible futures to see what her family was doing. She wanted to spend some time with herself for once. 

Garnet sat down on Steven's bed, and then laid back, laying stiff and straight like a board. It was a comfy bed; maybe humans were onto something here. She closed her third eye, while watching the ceiling and tracing patterns in the grains of the wood with the other two. 

She worried about her fellow Crystal Gems all the time. Of their physical safety, of course, but even more so their mental well-being. Everything that Steven was going through worried her of course, but Garnet was glad that he at least had Connie. But the other two. She felt like she had to be so careful around them, to act strong for them. Pearl could be so cold and hard while being so brittle at the same time. And while Amethyst had come a long way with her self-esteem issues, it still seemed like one day she could be fine and the next day feel like the garbage she accumulated in her room. 

She stopped in her thoughts and chuckled: she could think a couple other gems who fit those descriptions too. But permanent fusion to each other wasn't the answer for Pearl and Amethyst, no matter how well it had worked for Ruby and Sapphire. 

Garnet thought of Opal. It would be nice to get to know her better. But Pearl and Amethyst didn't manage to keep their fusion together very long outside of battle. Which was a fitting symbol for the Crystal Gems in general. When it had been an all-out war, there had been no time to worry and feel bad about yourselves: everyone had had a purpose. 

She caught herself with that thought: the same could be argued for Home World. Rose Quartz had freed them all to be who they truly wanted to be, for better or for worse. Some had had better reasons to fight than others. Ruby and Sapphire would never have joined the rebellion on their own; but if they wanted to be together, they - she - had nowhere else to go. Gems who were defective or off-color had had so much more to gain in the rebellion that they--

Garnet open all of her eyes and furiously blinked the tears away. Thousands of years later she still couldn't think of her comrades, all those that were lost, and whose shards were now thousands of miles below her stuck forever in--

She disappeared her shades and covered her face in her hands and sobbed big heaving sobs. 

"Garnet?"

She looked up and Steven was standing above her. She smiled at him and sat up, while wiping away her tears. She had not seen him coming and it felt nice to be surprised for a change.  

"Hello Steven," she said. He sat down next to her. 

"Garnet. I think we should talk." He looked serious, in that adorable way children do when they look serious. He also looked incredibly young to her at that moment, and she remembered just how young and just how human he really was. 

"What's on your mind cutie pie?" She asked. 

"You."

Garnet's expression didn't change but she was alarmed.  

"I think there is something bothering you, and I just think you should talk about it."

Garnet smiled. 

"Steven." Her voice was full of warmth and love. "You are a great gem, and a great human. And even though you're Rose's son, and even though you have her gem, and even though Rose was our leader: I'm still your mum. So I don't want you worrying about me, or Pearl, or Amethyst, not in the way a general or a leader would. We are your family. It is not your responsibility to solve our issues. We've had them for thousands of years, we can manage."

Steven pondered about what Garnet had said. She continued:

"I just want you to feel safe, loved and able to trust us. I may not always make the best decisions, but _we will always find a way_ ," she sang the end of her sentence. It made him smile, and she smiled back at him. Music was a powerful force for the Crystal Gems and she made a mental note to remember that better in the future. 

"Okay. Thanks Garnet. So... there's nothing I could do for you?"

"There is  _one_ thing."

Steven looked surprised and concerned. Garnet tried to speak gently. 

"I know you love Ruby and Sapphire, and they love you too, but it hurts my feelings when you are excited for me to unfuse. They have chosen to stay fused, I like being me, and it is the reason we are here on Earth in the first place. It's important to me, and to them, to be me."

Steven was completely blind-sided by her vulnerable confession. "Oh! I'm sorry Garnet, I never thought of it like that and I didn't mean to--"

"I know. Don't feel bad. And of course you can be excited to see them if I do need to unfuse sometime. Just... please be excited to see me, too."

"I always am," Steven said with a laugh and hugged her.  She hugged him back, and then got up. Before leaving Garnet turned around to look at him and said:

"Good talk."

* * * * *

Later that evening Garnet sat alone on the beach, meditating and watching the waves lapping gently against the sand, the horizon stretching into the distance as the sunset slowly colored everything pink. 

Inside her fusion space Ruby and Sapphire were having a conversation. Steven had been right: she did need to talk to someone. One of the perks of being a fusion: you could always talk to yourself.

"We need to talk about... the Cluster," Sapphire said, her voice breaking and her eye welling up with tears at the last word. Ruby nodded solemnly and took the hand of the love of her life. 

On the beach Garnet sat still, tears running quietly down her face, as she addressed all the horrifying things that were bothering her, and sought solace in love. 


End file.
